Living in the dog house

Yesturday for some reason I was feeling hungry for my dinner a little earlier than usual. My owner had prepared a home made pizza with fresh tuna as a topping. In order to cook the pizza the oven apparently needs to pre heat, so he popped away for a short time to wait for that light on the oven to go out. Well I could just smell it, you know, it was right there on the table, just smelling of tuna. mmmm I paced and paced around the kitchen floor, my nose bobbing in the air, and the more I thought about it , the more I wanted it. You know like when the button says 'do not press' you just can't stop thinking about what it might do, and you'r just so tempted to press it. Well this was just like that, don't touch the pizza!
I just jumped up for a look initially, you know, just to see it, then when I was up there I thought one tiny piece won't matter they wont even notice. I mean chances are I would be getting a bit when it's cooked anyway, why not just have my bit now, it's not unreasonable, so I took a tiny piece, but then the unthinkable happed, the pizza slid off the table!! Oh my god! nooooo, quick get rid of the evidence, i'v never eaten so fast in my life. My jaws aching from quickly trying to chew the uncooked dough. my owner returned and started shouting, I sat there saying, I never saw any pizza, are you sure you made one? maybe it's still in the fridge. Oh yes I remember now there was a bird flew in through the window , I saw him take it, honestly. Unfortunatley what I didnt realise was the large amount of white flour clinging to my whiskers and chin.
So I got a big row and no dinner ( not that I needed it) and my owner had to order in a take away , which I also didnt get any of. So today i'm in the dog house.

Camping is not a hotel

So camping is not a hotel, no room service, no en suite and no laundry service, but overall it was enjoyable.

Upon arrival the humans quickly erected a make shift refugee camp. It consisted of some water proof tarpaulin stretched across poles to form a crude shelter. I stayed in the car during this process (very wise). They arranged the shelters in a square formation creating a clear square area of living space in the middle of the dwellings. This I took to be ‘our patch’ and I was extremely vigilant about protecting this area from friend and foe alike.

All was fine until night fell and the realisation set in that we were actually going to sleep here.Well I wasn’t up for that, after protesting strenuously my owner and I ended up spending half of the first night in the car. Once the camping site had gone quiet for the night we snuck back into the tent but it was a restless night with many unusual noises and bumps and I spent the night growling and barking.

The next day was pleasant indeed, although I had barely slept I was only too happy to go for a long canal side walk, and to add to it the humans had small boats on the canal so I was ducking a diving in and out of the water alongside the boats. At one point I alerted a mother duck and got a peck on the nose for it. After a long walk we stopped for a pub lunch and it was made all the better by a substantial helping of Garlic Bread and prime streak.

After a long walk back and my lack of sleep you would think I would have slept like a log, but not the case, this time I opted to sleep in the porch of the tent that way I could survey my patch all night and make sure no one stepped foot in our designated area, and that was all great. I was quiet all night as well as staying dry.

It did rain once whist we were at the camp, and my goodness did it rain, it was a down pour , and I was not prepared to get trapped in the tent again so I weathered the storm outside alone.

Overall I enjoyed camping besides my lack of sleep, I had a good canal walk and swim and had a fun time talking to Eva. I think we understood each other, I talked dog and she seemed to respond, it’s strange that the smaller the humans are the easier it is to communicate in dog.

The only slight misunderstanding came when she tried to eat my dinner, I tried to explain that it was mine but I think we had cross wires.

Other than camping I spent the week at the grandparent’s house and had a very nice time, lots of long walks, even one that was cut short by a field of un-friendly bulls.Lots of swimming in the river and I even went for a ride on the bus.

A Winning Part

Hi guys, I'm so excited I just had to share. I was approached a few days ago by a singer songwriter, to appear in his new music video (Winning). It's not EMI or anything but everyone has to start somewhere. Apparently I was approached for my good looks and soft fluffy complexion. The guy himself felt I would be a better choice for a front man. I haven't had confirmation that they will use this version for official release, but they gave me a copy to keep for posterity.

So check out my new staring role :)

Back in the Saddle

Welcome back friends, I am feeling back to myself today you will all be pleased to hear. The pain killers are doing their job and I'm bouncing around the house like a spring chicken. Speaking of chicken I ate a full dinner and asked for seconds, as all good labradors do.
I have had a short walk to the park and ran around a little with the ball, nothing to heavy. Tomorrow weather permitting I hope to take a gentle walk to Roslin again.

Breakfast at Grozny's

So, I am still feeling under the weather, and I have been off my food for about two or three days now. Monday was the worst day, I turned down all food, but I have been feeling slightly better day on day since then.
I decided to visit the vet today to get some pain killers and for her to check out my leg.
She pulled and prodded and twisted my leg and the upshot is that I have a 'creaky' knee, this means I have to stay off it for a few days to see how it goes.
Surprisingly because of my lack of appetite my leg wasn't the only thing she prodded and poked - she took my temperature which involved sticking a thermometer in a rather unpleasant place. Following this she checked my glands which involved her sticking her fingers in the same unsavory place. - I tried to tell her that food coming out the other end was functioning normally, and that it was food intake that was the issue, but she didnt speak dog :( .All I wanted was some pain killers which I did eventually get, along with a sore bottom.

I have to return on Monday if I am still feeling unwell.

So the next problem my owners faced is how do you get a dog to eat when he is not hungry, well first you try different dog food - then you try human food, and if all that fails you feed him dog food off a plate using a fork to fool him into thinking its something really good he just can't resist.



So I will take it easy over the weekend and let you know how I get on on monday

Some Down Time

I thought I would try and write a bit of blog, as it might take my mind off the pain. It seems yesterday that I have damaged my back leg. I don't know what I've done, but it's very sore indeed. I have limped around since yesterday afternoon, mostly trying to sleep. It hurts so much I just can't get comfortable, iv tried basket, couch, floor but nothing helps.

My owners have tried to be supportive, rubbing the leg, looking at it with a torch (not sure what that does, makes it brighter I suppose, some strange tribal remedy idea they've got- I dunno.)

They offer treats and chocolate biscuit but I don't wanna eat, I just want to sleep for five minutes without the pain.

To top it off the little tribal member is here for the day running around being noisy, I'm not in the mood for kids at the best of times.

I did feel a little better this morning when my owner let me up on the bed for a cuddle, I'm not normally allowed up there, but she rubbed my ear until I fell asleep, it was nice until someone rang the door bell and 'ding' wide awake I was again.

Hopefully this will only last a few days - I have a holiday booked in August, I am due to go camping. I'll be honest with you, I don't know what camping is, according to one of my owners it's not a hotel, so that just confused me even more. I have been told there is swimming available at this camping site, so I will focus on that nice thought and try and get better in time.

I read on the Internet that it could take up to two weeks to heal if it's tissue damage. If I don't feel better in the next few days I might go and see the vet, see if I can get some pain killers.

Thanks for listening folks, it's helped to talk, takes my mind off it for a while, I'll be back soon.

Love you all

Grozny.

Bad back to basics

Well, what an eventful few days, last night at around 8pm gmt I was following my owner down the stairs when she slipped and fell to the bottom, covering herself in a full cup of tea, and hurting her back quite badly. As helpful as dogs are I just stood there and looked on as she crawled around on the floor in pain and others were picking up pieces of broken tea cup.

I played nurse maid for the rest of the night, with cuddles and attention as she laid on the couch complaining. I even had to pull her up the stairs to bed, I'm such a hero.

So today she was feeling much better not that I noticed I was up with the lark and moseying around down the stairs whilst the invalid had a lie in. There is nothing worse than an incapacitated owner, whilst she was lying in bed, I drank out of the toilet, chewed up lots of tissues I stole from the recycling bin, brought in sticks from the garden and chewed them up on the living room floor and finally raided the bin for left overs...ahhh..all in days work, by the time my owner made it out of bed I was out for the count and fast asleep.









I was next called upon in the early afternoon to empty the washing machine and tumble dryer- yes that's right I'm house dog, nurse maid, turned domestic goddess. Since the invalid can't bend down to empty the washing machine it was my job to drag out each item into a basket ready for the tumble dryer. It was great fun, you should have seen her face when I ran off with a sock, and the best part is she couldn't chase me, so I apologise to the person who will find only one clean sock in their laundry pile as I have forgotten where I left the other one.

Later in the evening we took a VERY SLOW walk over to the park where I met Moose the German Shepard. He is 7 months old and kept stealing my ball :( we had great fun chasing it though, our owners were racing us across the park, but I was just not quick enough to get to the ball before Moose, which wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't kept stealing it, he even tried to take it home!

Anyway friends thanks again for tuning in, below is a link to the Labrador story of the week- enjoy.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/edinburgh_east_and_fife/10467184.stm